#134 – Do Fairies Have Tails ?

I never was one to believe in fairy tales, even tho I really wished I could. I quite literally never had a childhood. What memories I have of those years are not mine, but a collection comprised of the others in the system who did experience those years. As I mentioned in last weeks #SystemSunday, memories from others are like looking back through family albums and old home movies. I can see them, but have no emotional connection to them, so while I know that Beka has always, and still does, believe in all things fairy, unicorn and magical happily ever afters, I never experienced the wonder of believing in something I knew could not exist. Happily ever afters are something from movies, and the dashing prince on the white horse was likely photo shopped.

That is until I met Phillip.

Our story is probably the closest thing I have ever experienced to what one might consider a fairy tale love story. It was not one I ever saw coming, nor did He. For years, I had him crowned as King of the Friend Zone. He held that position fiercely and with conviction. He was always there to pick me up when I felt defeated, to bring me coffee when I was a raging under caffeinated bitch, to bolster my confidence when it was failing, and to generally be the voice of reason when all was lost.

He watched me from his throne in the Friend Zone for years, walking into one mistake after the other, and still hoping beyond hope that maybe I would be happy. Maybe this was the one that was going to work for me, and not against me. Maybe, just maybe …. but it never was.

Last fall, I was on a whirlwind tour of all things bad for me. One after the other. I was no sooner leaving one mans bed before I was jumping in the next. I told myself, and everyone else, that I was over #SluttySummer and had gone full tilt into #SnuggleFuckFall. I made a joke of it, like I almost always do when I am trying to convince myself that my behavior was fine, which by the way, it was.

While I am fully 100% supportive of woman OR men experiencing a full range of adult activity without shame for it, because lets face it, sex is amazing if you are doing it right ! I also will admit that while it is perfectly healthy and enjoyable to partake in multiple sexual or intimate partners, sometimes the mental behind the scenes for it, is somewhat lacking, and the behavior comes from a desperate need to fill a void.

This is where King Phillip of the Friend Zone finally could not bear to keep watching the train wreck that I was becoming. He took off his crown, stepped across the border, grabbed me by the hair and told me quite firmly, and without pause, to Sit the fuck down, at his feet, and just fucking STAY .. and I have been here since.

I had known that Phillip was a dominant, from the day that we met so many years ago, but it was not until that moment, that I had ever felt it directed at me in such a way as to make me fall to my knees, quite willingly. He had never seen it as His place to take that role with me, as I was not His, and He felt that He was not the type of dominant that I needed, or wanted. Truth be told, up until that moment I did not think that he was either. I had always seen Phillip as weighing far more heavily on the Daddy side of the D/s spectrum than I knew worked for me, and could never bring myself to see Him as the more firm Dominant that I knew I needed.

I was wrong.

Yes, my Sir, you can save this and quote me on it later all You like, I will fully admit that in that one particular instance, I was wrong.

So while I may not believe in the typical happily ever after type of fairy tales that little girls grow up on, I think for once I find myself believing in something more than just happily right now.

~ SCENE ~

CuCa Designs – La Dolce Vita Backdrop @ Pose Fair
LOVE – CHERISH – BRIDAL SCENE

~ POSE ~

CuCa Designs – La Dolce Vita – 01 @ Pose Fair

~ WORN ~

  • Kaitlyn

Body : Legacy Body – Female
Head : Catwa – Catya
Skin : DeeTaleZ – Heidi – Eastern
Hair : Sintiklia – Pamela – Light blondes
Glasses : Deep Static – Oliver
Top : VISION – Taylor Top – #7
Skirt : DDL – Pencil Skirt – Nude
Necklace – Supernatural – Precious Necklace @ Level Event
Rings : Yummy – Gala Ring Set
Ring : Ysoral – Luxe Wedding Ring – Jade
Nails : RatzCatz – Bento Nails
Hair Flowers : LODE – Peony Poem [peach]

  • Phillip

Body : Signature – Gianni
Head : AK Deluxe – Clay
Skin : VendettaGabriel – T5
Hair : Stealthic – Barron
Tattoo : Speakeasy – Flying High
Shirt : Cold Ash – Raphael Shirt – Grey
Pants : Cold Ash – Alessio Trousers – Black
Ring : Ysoral – Luxe Wedding Ring – Evan

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